Ez igy helyes Angolul?
It was a gorgeous sunny day, and Eden and me went for a walk in the forest near to the Bally River. I always knew that there is something wrong with her, but i have never asked her about her problems. So on that day we ran down to the river, singing 'oranges and lemons' and looked for wee crabs. But one day everything changed. I was in my house doing my homework, when i herard something from he maindoor. i went downstairs, and found her on the floor. it was Eden, with small drips of blood on her arm. She cut her veins because she wanted to die. I immidiately called the ambulance and the police. But it was too late. And she passed away...Sometimes i blame myself, because i could ask her about the troubles in her family and i could help, but....i couldnt.
ez igy helyes? suliba kellett irni:)
az eleje szerintem jobban hangzana így:
..sunny day when Eden and...
Bally River helyett = River Bally (fordítot az angolban a szórend)
I always knew.. = ez után mindent eggyel múltabba kell tenni és egyenes lesz a szórend, tehát I always knew that something was wrong with her
a legvége szerintem:
because I would have been able to ask her if she had had troubles in her family and I would have helped, but... I didn't
az immediately (immidiately) és a heard (herard) gondolom csak véletlenül van elírva
más most nem vettem észre
Jó.
near után nem kell to
there was something
I never asked (mert már nem is tudja többet kérdezni)
On that day - milyen napon? nincs logikai összefüggés
Mi az a main door? Esetleg front door
found her ... it was Eden - megint logikai bakugrás, honnan tudod, hogy her, ha még nem mondod, ki az.
could have asked her, could have helped - tehettem volna, előidejűség a múlthoz képest
vége: but I didn't
" and Eden and me went for a walk "
Ez csak nekem hangzik furán? Én folyamatos múltba tenném (...Eden and me were going for a walk)
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